Category: Dating and Relationships
I want to know how did you know that you were in love. I have thought that I was in LOVE, but I was wrong. I just want to hear your thoughts on this subject.
ouch, what a tricky question that <grin>
Well, there are a thousand types of love but I guess we're thinking romantic love.
There are even many types of romantic love. E.g. I had a friend that played piano just incredibly. We were just good friends and no attraction but when she played for me (or played in general) I could swear for those moments I was so carried away by her playing that I was in love with her, it went away the second she stopped playing and I never thought of going out with her or something but that feeling was very intense and surprising, yet no less valid, in a way, than a long-term relationship.
Then, well, what is love, is it intense physical attraction, is that dreaming about the person, is that putting that person before yourself in many things that you do (or everything really), dunno, may be a bit of all of these things. I've been in love a few times and it's been different girls and it was different every time. Things went wrong and I feel out of love but I think everytime I felt I was in love I was right about it, if you're in love and things change, doesn't mean you were wrong, just means it didn't last for whatever reason and it went away.
i dont know how to describe it, as they say, when youre in love, youll know. its as simple as that, at least to me.
I'll let you know when it happens. I thought it did once but was wrong. I'll let you know when it really does happen
Well, I think that when you're in love, there are so many things. It's skipping a heartbeat when you hear that person's voice, it's catching yourself thinking about them, when you should be thinking about something else, wanting to be with them physically, dreaming about them, waking up in the middle of the night and thinking about them, wondering if they ever think about you as well, wondering what they're doing when you're not together, missing them intensely when they're not around and not being able to wait till you can see them again, but above all else, and this, in my view is what seperates love from infatuation, is the need and desire, and ability to put that person before yourself, to be there, unconditionally, whenever they need you, to believe in them without question, and to love them not only because of who they are, but in spite of who they are, and to accept them for the person they are, faults and all, after all, nobody's perfect.
But that's just my opinion *smiles*
Ahh! the unanswerable question hmm I couldn't sleep or concentrate, or think about anything, or anyone else I heard her voice all the time and when we were apart after intense kissing ect I'd still feel Ardeth's hands and lips, on my skin,I would liken it to being haunted in the best possible way...
hahahah I think that's just being obsessed with the person's physical presence. You know, like when you have a crush on them. I believe that when you're truly in love, you'll love them no matter what... Even though they might not be the best person for you. They could have problems with holding their temper, lying to you, keeping their job, or be a substance abuser, gamble all the time, be mentally unstable, you know the rest... But you would still respect them and stand by them. You might at first believe that they will change, but when it's apparent that they won't or can't, you learn to accept them for who they are and the love grows stronger!!!
psycholoical studies on lovers have shown that we mentally block out our partners faults, and amplify their good points, to make them more attractive,but enough of that psycho mumbo jumbo....
This is very interesting. I promise, I will let you guys know when I am also.
I disagree that you love them no matter what. I can tell you love can be killed...No, not over night, but it does happen. I've been in love 4 times. The first was a child's love of friendship, curiosity and so on...The second I still love, but I wouldn't return to him no matter what...He hurt me to bad...To deeply. The third that I can think of killed my love for him through his own actions and preferences, but that's a story I don't feel I need to get into. Let's just say he was depressive, never happy, didn't want to work on it, and a few other things...The last is my husband. The feeling I get inside is so intence it is almost painful, but still quite so pleasurable. I'm not talking about physical attraction, but a feeling in the core of me; where we feel the pain of sarrow, that is over welming and possessing. It feels like an explosion is about to occur, and we can make it through everything. When I feel it the strongest it has nothing to do with physical attraction, but love that can and has brought me to tears, a feeling that no matter what everything will work out, we'll survive, and still be together. Beyond that, I can't explain anymore...
U'll understand what it means, u dont need a manual to understand it... when ur in love, it can't be anything else. Ur in love when the person u love is in the room and your heart starts bbeating, and u can hardly speak, and everything he or she does is sacred to u. Thats when ur in love.
How interesting.
Like my friend Love4All said it's hard to explain, you just know.
Okay. I'll take that.
In my relationship I have now, I recognized it because I just - hm, it's difficult to describe - I felt we would have much in common, felt more confortable with him than with others, and thought of him very, very often, almost all the time.
Well, I've decided to give up. Forget love. Forget it altogether.
Well you might say that now, but if you find someone then and you suddenly feel all that what we described, I doubt if you still thought this way.
dont give up, it will come when you least expect it. i wasnt expecting to find love, and here i am, happier than ive ever been.
Well love, that's a wonderful topic which everyone views differently. Love, like any other emotion comes and goes. Someone always loves more then another so to try and turn off love is like trying to turn off happyness. Good luck. As for in love, to me that sounds like a temperary thing. I think love is like the vowes of the wedding you'll never know until death do you part. When times are good and health is well, loves is like a field of flowers. But when times are bleak and health declineing, love can be as elusive. as snipe hunting.
Hmm, I think a true love isn't that come and go type of thing. My husband and I have been through hell together, and the one thing that has kept us going is our love for one another. *smile* As for giving up? Don't. Some day you will find the person that turns the key the right way, and when you do don't turn it away. *smile* I've been telling my brother for years not to give up, and you know what? He didn't and now he's fallen hard and fast. *smile* He finally has a good woman; unlike most that he'd found before...So, it is there.
Thanks guys. I was just lonely and upset for some reason last night.
Love it comes and it goes like rain . when you start to feel good and start to care about a certain someone that you're willing to take a chance, it is also a feeling that will make you give that person up just to see him or her happy . Love hurts a lot i guess when you feel it there is NO stoping you because when your in love, your in your best you do things at your fullest potentials just to prove how much motivated you are by that person, Infatuation is near falling in love and Friends always have a chance to be lovers that is my definition of being in love, Theres more to it than feeling good, having a fast eart rate and butterflies in your stomach Love is a lot of sacrifice
No, not really. If you find true love it won't go that easily. And, well, as I already said: Don't give up. It might take some time. See, I never thought I would get a boyfriend. Now I do, and I got my first one when I was nearly 17. It's never too late.
True love sounds to me more hopeful then fact. I mean who enters a relationship just to have it crash and burn. I mean no one enters a relationship and is like ok, for three months we'll live in blis then how about this. You'll cheat on me and we'll crash and burn. Smile. If it's true love then why didn't you just stop at the first one you were with? To me you can't know if it's true love until the end. For some the end comes at different times. For some it's death and for some it's the break up. Kind of like that hign site is always twenty twenty. In that moment doesn't it feel like true love. Who's to say in that moment it wasn't true love. If ,your true love isn't with you very long does that mean that wasn't your true love then? Let me ask this, what is the difference between love and true love? I am not talking parent and child love or person pet love, but love between two people who plan to be together. Don't get me wrong I am not a downer on love, I think you should seek it with determination and focous. Your not standing at some bus stop and love is not the bus. You must be active in the search. They say no body looks for love cause if you do then you'll never find it. But come on when the road is smooth it's easy to feel nothing but love. When the road is bumpy and full of obstacles do you make together or do you part ways. even if you do part ways does that mean that that wasn't your true love? One more point then I will get off my soap box. In any relationship one always cares more then the other. How do you know that what is true love for you is true love for your partner. Is it his or her actions, his or her words, or both?
Yeah. I can#t stand people who cheat on their Partners. If you really, truly love someone, then you would not leave him.
You got that right.
I'd rather be honest to my partner if I found someone else or if I found I couldn't live this way any longer than cheating on him. I think this is just cruel.
I think the differences are shown through the test of time...For instants, do you lean on each other when time gets rough? Or do you leave till things are better...Do you turn to each other when you feel at your lowest? Or, do you run out with the friends...Do you except and love that person for who and what they are? Or, do you try to change them...Those are just a few ideas that comes to mind. My husband and I have only been together eight years, and while I won't say that nothing can break us up; I know most things won't...We've been through a miss carriage, absolutely broke, homelessness; the good and the bad, and we've held each other together. We turn to each other when we feel our lowest, and block the rest of the world away. We love each other for who we are, not what we think we can be. Yes, we do ask if they can stop doing something that annoys us; for instants me biting my nails, but we don't demand it, we don't say we'll leave if you don't...However, I also have to agree that love is sacrifice. If I thought something else would make my husband happy I'd do my best to let him have it; if not fight to give it to him...Even if it was watching him walk away. As far as knowing? You never truly know; unless your a mind reader, but you do learn to trust, hope and believe. How? By not being blind to any potential signs that are given. For instants, my ex fiance told me that I was second best, but I was blind to his words, and only listened to what I wanted to hear. To say the least we're not together today. While I was ready to accept things for what they were...When times got rough he broke, and I walked. My husband on the other hand never has told me that; matter of fact, it's been just the opposite.
Everyone should love each other for what and who they are and should not try to change them.
True love is different from that feeling of your heart beating fast or whatever. I agree that it's about sacrifice, but it's also about safety and connection. you feel safe with that person. You can tell them anything, and they you, and you both know each other well enough that you know you won't be judged. You are like best friends, but you're also attracted to each other deeply, and those two feelings merge into one so that you can feel them separately but they're usually together as one larger-than-life, wonderful feeling. My definition of true love takes a long time of growth and development together to feel. Until then, I would say, just enjoy the ride and know you both might feel it for each other some day but that it can't be rushed.
Yeah, you feel safe and you trust this person, this is important.